Have you ever wondered why you weren’t able to sustain your progress toward your goal?   It’s a common experience.  You may start out with great drive and enthusiasm, only to begin to lose motivation.   You may think there is just something wrong with YOU.  But have you ever considered the idea that the problem may rest in the nature of your goal?

Basically, all goals are to some degree or another, a “moving toward” goal or a “moving away from” goal.  A “moving toward” goal is something very positive and so satisfying that it drives us forward.  An example might be pursuing a life-long interest that you find stimulating and rewarding. 

A “moving away from” goal is motivated by the desire to GET AWAY from something negative.  An example of this might be the goal to leave a noxious work environment, or the desire to lose weight. 

“Moving away from” goals can be very powerful in the initial stages of motivating us, but the further away from the negative you get, the more your motivation drops.  The intensity of the negative is no longer strong enough to drive you. 

Most of us have both “moving away from” and “moving toward” goals.  There are goals we are excited to pursue for their own sake, and goals that have us running from the negatives as fast as we can.  In fact, many goals have aspects of both.  

For example, the desire to go into business for yourself may be driven both by the desire to pursue an interest or passion AND by the desire to get away from a boss who doesn’t utilize your talents fully.  By the same token, the desire to earn money may be due to wanting to get away from a background of poverty and want, or the desire to be able to use the money to buy something you want. 

It is important to know whether your goals are “moving away from” or “moving toward” as this will affect your outcome.  Why?  If you are focused upon “moving away from” something, you will ultimately be focused upon the NEGATIVE–you will be working hard to AVOID something.  Putting that kind of energy focusing on the negative that you are trying to avoid will ultimately drive you toward creating that negative.  Although the negative goal may drive you initially toward another outcome, you’ll be unlikely to maintain your movement away from it.  That focus on what you are seeking to avoid will gradually pull you back. 

The dilemma of “moving away from” and “moving toward” goals tends to be what lies behind burnout and inconsistent results.  We may change our direction in order to “move away,” but we can’t maintain it, and the goal we seek is not motivating in and of itself. 

What’s the answer?   It is important for you to know to what extent your goals are “moving away from” and “moving toward.”  One way to do this is to list the goals you have about some particular part of your life.  Then determine what percentage of this is a “moving away from” goal.   You may be surprised at how many of them you have.  Once you know this, you may be able to identify what it is you are moving away from and take some steps to determine what to do about it.  There may be ways you can increase the percentage of “moving toward” that exists in your goals. 

The point is that by thinking it through and making a plan you can better optimize your results.  Having a plan allows you to use your energy, money and other resources wisely, as well as avoiding the horrible feeling of disappointment when you don’t reach the goal that you thought you wanted so badly!

©  2003 by Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.

Linda Pucci, Ph.D. is a psychologist, life coach, trainer and owner of Inner Resource Center, LLC in Maryville, TN.  She has 30 years of experience helping people overcome obstacles and self-sabotage by using her solution focused approach.  She is dedicated to helping people find the resources they need to transform their lives.  For more information and free resources, go to http://www.InnerResourceCenter.com .

Category: New Directions