A friend is thinking of quitting her job, due to its stress.  She would be downsizing into retirement.  She asked my advice.  This is what I wrote back is:

Since you asked, I gave it some thought, and was thinking you need to think ahead to how to replace certain things:

1.      Ego needs–you have always seemed to have a love/hate relationship with stressful yet successful jobs, even twnety years ago.  So you might want to think of how you will feed your ego needs.  Maybe volunteering, or writing, or defining some goal for yourself.

2.      Financial needs–I do not know your financial situation, so cannot advise, but have you thought of talking to your employer, cutting down on your trade area, perhaps trying to get a lateral transfer to a lower stress job, going part-time, asking to be a consultant to the organization, even part-time, subcontracting with your co-workers to help them put on their events, to supplement retirement income?  Or, I have always thought you would be great at a bookstore.  

3.      Creative needs–finding a goal that helps vent that energy

4.      Social needs–how will you get out to see people and interact?

After thinking it through, she decided to stay with her job, to find the parts she enjoyed and try to enjoy them more, etc.  I asked what I had said that made her decide to stay, as I really did think her job was overly stressful for her.  She said that my note back to her made her realize that she had no goals, and nothing to replace the void she would create if she quit her busy fulltime job.  I am sure she is now thinking about what she would like to do instead, so that she will be in good shape with a set of goals, once she decides to quit and reitre.

Also, I suggested rather than retiring that she reinvent herself!  She has always been good at poetry and piano and loves books.   She also used to subsitute teach, which a friend recommends, as each day you can decide if you want to go to work or not. Although she may not make as much money, she may find something equally if not more rewarding.  I have taken up painting, and still find it amusing that new people in my life think of me as an artist rather than as a professor.

Category: JoNel's Blog