Years ago, I thought the way to be successful was to have a lot of drive and be willing to put in as many hours as necessary to accomplish a task. Trouble was, the tasks always kept growing and I never got any closer to being “done.” When I finished one task, it was usually replaced by several others. Although I was successful by outward standards, I was significantly “out of balance” in my life. I was often worn-out and prone to getting whatever virus came along.
Luckily, as is often the case, I found myself teaching the things I needed to learn myself. I worked with clients who were so busy taking care of others that they found themselves depleted, angry, or depressed. It was from this work that I discovered the importance of SELF-CARE.
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Category: Getting There
I find it fascinating to listen when people are really talking about something about which they feel passionately. Their voice becomes stronger. They speak more rapidly.
Sometimes they speak louder. Their voice quality changes in a way that moves the words they are saying from their mouth, into their throat, and then to their chest. My impression is always that the words are now coming from their heart.
The transformation is pretty remarkable. Ordinary conversations turn into passionate speeches. The difference is that their passion has been ignited.
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Category: Getting There
How do you define success? If you don’t know the answer to this question, you are wasting your time setting goals.
There are probably as many definitions of success as there are people trying to find success. For some, success has to do with making a certain amount of money; for others, it has to do with living a particular type of lifestyle; for still others, it has to do with the quality of relationships they have with others or with God.
A person’s definition of success influences their ability to set good goals. Success is often seen as the achievement of something you desire, plan or attempt. However, success is more than just the accomplishment of goals, or marking things off of a “to do” list. What we envision success to look like defines what is really important to us, and is a statement of our core values.
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Category: Getting There
As a therapist and coach, I find that people often struggle with emotions. Some people have trouble feeling their emotions at all–they have numbed themselves so completely that they neither feel particularly good nor particularly bad.
This is a problem because they don’t know what they feel. There isn’t enough intensity to register the emotion.
Others feel their emotions so intensely that the negative emotions disrupt their lives. They are so depressed, angry, fearful, hurt or guilty that they cannot enjoy their lives. This is a problem for them, as well as for those with whom they interact.
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Category: Getting There
Emotions are normal. Even negative emotions such as anger, sadness, hurt, fear, or guilt. They aren’t right or wrong, they just ARE. We feel them in response to things that happen to us. The type of emotion we feel depends on the kind of experience we’ve had.
The problem with negative emotions is that often we carry around old emotions from past experiences. We’re STILL angry about something that happened years ago. We are still afraid of repeating mistakes we made when we were young. We still feel guilty about something we did last year. We’re still hurt by how someone treated us way back when.
Our feelings from old experiences become emotional clutter in our lives.
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Category: Getting There
